Monday, December 01, 2008

CALLING MR. PEABODY AND THE WAYBACK MACHINE

I've been thinking about how to put some of the feelings I've had about this past weekend into words. I was unsure how to start this mainly because i was trying to avoid coming across as a total, weepy sap.

This past weekend was my and Chrissy's 20 Year High School Reunion. Yes, for those few of you who actually read this rambling mess of disjointed musings I call a blog and who do NOT know... my wife Chrissy and I were high school sweet-hearts. We both went to Levittown Division High School. We started dating in 1987, went to the Senior Prom together and have been a staple in each others lives since. Through thick and thin she's been my guiding light.

Jeez... see what I mean about sappy?

ANYway... as I was saying... this past weekend was our 20 yr reunion. We had gone to our 10 year reunion, and while it was nice... it was not exactly a barn-buster. Wasn't much to write home about. I had my reservations about going to this one.

First off, the money situation (being so close to Tyler's Birthday and Christmas) was a factor, and second... I wasn't totally sure I was in the proper mind-set to revisit the past. Not that I had horrible memories of high school.. I don't at all. I have many great memories... but I also have a tendency to get very melancholy about such things and sometimes it's hard for me to shake it... so I was leaning towards not attending.

Chrissy wanted to go. She said a number times that she was hoping we'd be attending, and I hate not giving the lovely lady what she wishes, so the odds shifted.

Then came Lisa Fischer Macon.

Lisa and I have been friends for about... ten thousand years. We go back to third grade at Northside Elementary and were constants in each other's lives throughout graduating high school. Lisa was basically there for almost every major point in my life (sometimes in a major role, other times as a bit player) and there are few people who really KNEW me at almost every aspect of my life while I was growing up.

However, as much of us do, after graduation Lisa and I moved on in life and went in different directions. We lost touch and hadn't spoken in roughly 17 years or so. Time waits for no man (or woman) and life went on.

Fast forward to sometime in 2007. Thanks to the internet wonders of MySpace and Facebook, Lisa and I reconnected.

Along with Lisa, other people started popping out of the woodwork. Great names like Debbie Grossman, Tracy Fitzpatrick, John Castrogiovanni, Diane Ceccarelli... they sprung out at me. Ghosts of the past are not always scary things.

As time went by, the reunion loomed and at some point either Chrissy or I mentioned that we might not be going to the reunion.

Lisa pounced.

She would not take "no" for an answer. There was no way we were missing it, she said. I think she was prepared to show up at our door in full body armor, sword in hand, and ready to drag us there.

And as time continued, many of us old freinds began reconnecting in such a building mass that missing the reunion became an unheard of notion.

So, much to Chrissy's (and Lisa's) delight, we purchased our tickets and were a lock to go. As the countdown clicked away to the reunion's date, many of us made plans to after-reunion parties and hangouts and the such. We started stepping beyond the Facebook connection... Chrissy and I started hanging out with Tracy again. I talked to John, Diane and Lisa on the phone. We became parts of each other's daily lives again.

We built it up so much that it could not possibilly stand up to the hype.

So much for THAT theory.

This past weekend was beyond anything I really imagined. I'm not sure WHAT the heck I was expecting anymore. Everyone was excited for it, and we spent so much time talking about it that we were bound to have a let down.

But we not only avoided that let-down... things actually exceeded our expecations.

this was a whirlwind week for Chrissy and I. We had a wedding on November 23rd of two excellent friends that we met only last year. Two great people (Jason and Christine) who we love and cherish. Then came Thanksgiving. Then... the reunion.

Needless to say there was a lot going on.

I'm all over the place with this... just trying to get the emotion of the week out.

But from the moment we packed a crap load of alcohol into the van... to picking up Tracy... to knocking on the hotel door of a girl who is like a sister to me (Lisa) in so many ways and seeing her beaming smile in person for the first time in what seems like forever... to hearing the door knock of Debbie and seeing HER for the first time in forever... to picking up John at the train station and seeing the guy who was just about the best friend I had while growing into puberty for the first time in forever... the night started to morph into a barrage of feelings and emotions that I wasn't sure I was ready to handle. I held onto Chrissy tight that night... I needed her close to me... to be the beacon she's always been. To support the overload that my brain and heart was dealing with.

Then it got even more intense. Michelle Seigal, Tom Vesque, Steve Coffey, Lisa Elliot, Steve Fisher, Pat Bouton, Shaun Walters, Dominick Tinelli... the hits just kept on coming. Seeing everyone and talking about the past mingled with the present and... surreal and heartening. Seeing everyone and seeing the social cliques melted away and nothing but a bare desire to reconnect with our past was intense. Watching people slide easily into their old personalities, yet without any walls built up between each other was wonderful. The raw, honest joy we all took with seeing each other and catching up was pure. There was nothing phoney in it. The room dripped with sincerity. It was actually inspiring.


I looked at some of the people in that room... and I wondered.. how in the HELL did I let them slip away?

I have some amazing friends I have made over the years. After high school... in college... at work... I cherish them all.

There's room for everyone though. I'm not letting the old friends slip away ever again.

And on top of everything... we had new, wonderful people introduced into our lives. Lisa's husband, Brian... who Lisa was sure I would get along with... was like a brother I was seperated from at birth. After about 35 seconds, you would have thought we had known each other for 30 years. Lisa's cousin Fran, who I actually had met on a few occasions when we were kids fit in like she was just one of us (and she was), Debbie's husband, Dan, who was at a total disadvantage not having ANY contact with any of us was a great guy. Michelle husband, Mike, (whom we had actually met at the 10 year reunion) also was just one of the group.

There were people who did not make it. Jenni Sureda, Frank Harris, Mary McCabe... to name a few. They were missed. We'll make sure to give them other oppertunities to get together.

But... this weekend... putting it simply... this weekend was a mind blower.

The pictures only tell a small story... and it's a story that has no ending. At no point did anyone want the weekend to end. And for a lot of us... it won't end.

Hell, if it wasn't for the fact they'd miss their kids, we would have locked Lisa and Brian up and kept them in NY.

So, here's to our trip... from the past, back to the future and everywhere in between.

Miguel de Cervantes once said "Tell me what company thou keepst, and I'll tell thee what thou art."... well, I know what I am. I'm blessed. In love and in life.

Thanks all. Now... what the hell do we do for an encore?

10 comments:

John said...

I can't wait for the 40th HS reunion. I'll be 58, and if I'm lucky people will still say that I retained my youth (I chalk it all up to not smoking, low alcohol consumption, and not having a wife and kids!)

Unknown said...

Pat! I am speechless. You always write so beautifully and I am touched to the core.

Brian and I LOVE YOU AND CHRISSY! With all our hearts. We will see you VERY SOON!

fran said...

Well Said Pat.
I love you and Chrissy and I am sinerely honored to be a member of the pack. As for the follow up. I think we should go to Florida (in all fairness to Lisa and Brian) and have all the family members to attend. We may need to make it a week long event and have some sitters standing by for some night time events for the adults.

Patrick J. Nestor, Jr. said...

John, they'll be a $@%# load of hang outs before then, that's for sure.

Lee, I call 'em where I see 'em. The love is returned to you and Bri tenfold.

Fran, no doubt. Plans are being made for a trip down south. You are not only invited... but expected. We love you too.

Anonymous said...

http://www.cycnet.com/englishcorner/poem/022.htm


Pat your blog about reunion reminds me of this essay about friendship.

Patrick J. Nestor, Jr. said...

Mary, I got the one you emailed to me... it's a fantastic poem.

jenny said...

thanks so much for sharing this with us all...it was so heartfelt..and hit to the core! i was just crying..it really touched me. you always write so well...and i love to watch u all engage together with your words..but this took the cake!! thanks for wearing your heart on your sleeve and not holding back...i So Enjoyed reading!! xoxo God bless u and Christine and your beautiful boys!!! so happy to find u all again!

John said...

how come this blog doesn't ramble anymore? Rocketeer's Rambling? Keep writing!

RandiLala said...

pat-
i am SO sorry that we missed the reunion. i kick myself over that repeatedly. THANK YOU for such a wonderful posting - almost felt like we were there. you and chrissy are truly blessed; as are the people and friends with whom you choose to have in your life. i am very glad to have reconnected with you, since you are one of my oldest and dearest friends! god bless you, chrissy and your 3 fantastick boys!

fran said...

Hey when is the next get together?
Just putting it out there... and aren't we still supposed to be doing a kiddie get together???